If you’re here, maybe you the parent or your child have run into problems with your child’s behaviour in life, at school or worse with the police? I can help you!
Or maybe you’re just interested from one of my posts on some social network or other. Whatever……I’d urge you and each of my friends to continue to read this. Not because I believe it in any way fits the majority of my own friends, but because I believe we all know a parent that cannot cope – and where they haven’t done “the best” of the job so far; and it’s here, that I can help the child and the parent(s). Before it is too late.
As with most things, it needs saying, so I’ll say it. There is a massive problem in the world with lazy/misguided/uneducated (call it what you want) parenting and a silent tragedy in how “some people” are raising their children – resulting in problems for the child, the schools, the authorities and ultimately – a lifetime of needless (often very costly) problems for the child, and world of heartache for the child’s family.
As anybody who knows me “knows”; I have got a lifetime of experience in educating children in stimulative sports and adventurous environments and I’ve not met a child yet that I cannot coach and improve, both intellectually and physically – I actually prefer educating problem children to a lot of challenging adults.
I don’t want to blow my own trumpet too much, as you who know me, know who I am, what I’m qualified in and my level of experience in lifestyle coaching from controlling and educating unruly cadets, to qualified coaching of protégés in quite a number of different sports and adventurous pastimes.
I can supply plenty of references as to my coaching abilities with children (and how their parents can also learn), and not just with problem children either- anybody can benefit in an enjoyable, fun and healthy environment. Even with what I would consider “the best parents”, I like to believe all can (and will) learn something from me.
Kindly have a read of this and if you know anyone that can benefit from my personal lifestyle, adventure or sporting consultancy and coaching services, especially if a parent is at their wit’s end – please refer them to me. Thank you!
There is a silent tragedy that is unfolding today in our homes and concerns our most precious jewels: our children.
Our children are in a devastating emotional state! In the last 15 years, researchers have given us increasingly alarming statistics on a sharp and steady increase in childhood mental illness that is now reaching epidemic proportions:
• 1 in 5 children have mental health problems
• A 43% increase in diagnosed ADHD
• A 37% increase in adolescent depression has been noted
• There has been a 200% increase in the suicide rate in children aged 10 to 14
What is happening and what are people doing wrong?
Today’s children are being over-stimulated and over-gifted with material objects, but they are deprived of the fundamentals of a healthy childhood, such as:
• Emotionally available parents
• Balanced nutrition and adequate sleep
• Movement in general but especially outdoors
• Creative play, social interaction, unstructured game opportunities and boredom spaces
Instead, in recent years, children have been filled with:
• Digitally distracted parents
• Indulgent and permissive parents who let children “rule the world” and whoever sets the rules
• A sense of right, of deserving everything without earning it or being responsible for obtaining it
• Inadequate sleep and unbalanced nutrition
• Endless stimulation, technological nannies, instant gratification and absence of boring moments
What I can do and how I can (and will), help anybody?
If you want your children to be happy and healthy individuals, you have to wake up and get back to basics. It is still possible! Many families see immediate improvements after just a week with me, in identifying, recommending and implementing “just some” of the following recommendations (please note this list is extremely limited and is only what I’ll tell anybody for free; compared with what you actually could learn from me):
• Set limits and remember that you are the captain of the ship. Your children will feel more confident knowing that you have control of the helm.
• Offer children a balanced lifestyle full of what children NEED, not what they WANT. Don’t be afraid to always say “no” to your children if what they want is not what they need. Guess what, it’ll save you money and further problems.
• Provide nutritious food and limit junk food to very special occasions – birthdays and as rewards for other commendable achievements ONLY.
• Spend at least one hour with your child, per day “outdoors” (no phones, child or parent) doing activities such as gardening, cycling, walking, fishing, bird/insect watching – the list is endless.
• Enjoy a daily family dinner without smartphones, TV or distracting technology, let everyone talk and feel valued.
• At least once a week, play board games or cards, as a family or if children are too small for board games, just let them pretend to play it.
• Daily involve your children in some home Improvement or household chores according to their age (DIY, folding clothes, hanging clothes, unpacking the food, setting the table, feeding the dog, etc.)
• Implement a consistent sleep routine to ensure your child gets enough sleep. The schedules will be even more important for school-age children.
• Teach responsibility and independence. Do not overprotect them against all frustration or mistakes. Misunderstanding will help them build resilience and learn to overcome life’s challenges,
• Do not carry your children’s backpack, do not take to school the homework they forgot, do not drive them to school (even in the rain), do not peel bananas or peel oranges if they can do it on their own (4-5 years), do not tie their shoes laces for them, etc etc. Instead of giving them the fish, teach them to fish.
• Teach them to wait and delay gratification.
• Provide opportunities for “boredom”, since boredom is the moment when creativity awakens. Do not feel responsible for always keeping children entertained.
• Do not use technology as a cure for boredom, nor offer it at the first second of inactivity. A sandpit, pen and paper or Lego, is always infinitely better than TV, Smartphones and the Playstation.
• Never, ever allow technology during meals, in cars, restaurants, or shopping centres. Use these moments as opportunities to socialize by training the brains to know how to work when they are in mode: “boredom”
• Help them create a “bottle of boredom” with activity ideas for when they are bored. Boredom is only for those that are not intelligent enough to occupy their own mind. FACT!
• Be emotionally available to connect with children and teach them self-regulation/discipline and social skills:
• Always take phones off your child at night when children have to go to bed.
• Become a regulator and emotional trainer for your children. Teach them to recognize and manage their own frustrations and anger.
• Teach them to greet people (even introduced strangers kindly), to take turns, to share without running out of anything, to say thank you and please, to acknowledge all errors and apologize (do not force them) – be a model example of all those values you instil.
• Connect emotionally – smile, hug, kiss, tickle, read, dance, jump, play or crawl with your child.
And that is just a taster of what I can do to turning a problem families life around. Anybody can follow the above. But if I can educate the child AND SUBCONSCIOUSLY THE PARENT in person – it could keep a child out of prison, help a parent keep a child and ultimately save a world of cost and heartache for all of that child’s family.
Like I say. I’m yet to meet a child/parent that I cannot help, I have got a lifetime of experience in coaching kids and I have many references!